Gray Day

I must exude a certain amount of confidence or expertise in areas that I most times do not feel. Three times in the last 24 hours, I've had people ask me for help or direction because they just knew I'd have the answer. Well, I didn't. I don't. I'm clueless. Something about how they took the answer made me feel like they didn't believe me. Why would I lie to them and refuse to help? That is not in my nature and surely they know that about me.

Liars offend me. It is probably my biggest pet peeve of all. Be honest.

Yes. OK, I'll be honest too. I'm not perfect. I have told lies ... some small white lies and some big whoppers ...like when I was 16 and supposed to be at the movies, but really was out necking with a guy ... but I learned a lesson from that. I always feel really bad when I do lie and so I don't. Even small white lies can come back on you. Like saying to your mother-in-law that you really like some dish that she made when in reality you don't, but then she thinks you do so makes it for you every special occasion and you have to continue to eat it and pretend to like it because you lied. Lessons like that make me not lie.

And when I catch a certain someone in a lie, this someone that lies so often that she can't keep track of what she has said ... it makes me not want to be around her ... it makes me not trust anything that she ever says. And yet, she continues to lie never learning and she wonders why I don't believe her. I just don't get it.

Airport Musings

Traveling from Austin to Lubbock yesterday I was struck by several thoughts. First in the Austin airport, I saw a little old lady that reminded me of my grandmother. She was walking through the airport after having gotten off her plane ... coming to visit her grandkids. Mimi used to do the same thing only on buses. I wonder if Mimi were still alive if she would be flying now. I wonder if air travel then had been what it is now if she would have flown. After watching this lady greet her grandkids, I looked around and realized that the airports of today are much like the bus stations of yesteryear.

That got me to thinking of airports of the past. When I was growing up, I had an aunt that lived on the East coast. I remember going to the airport to pick her up at least a couple of times back in the early 1960's. If we were early, we would wait in the cafe which had windows looking out on the runways. Back then, you met your traveler on the tarmac. I have a very clear picture of the airplane, silver and seemingly huge! stairs rolled out to the plane, people dressed up coming down the stairs. (no one dresses up for travel on a plane now) I remember my aunt coming through the door and pausing, looking around and then seeing us and waving before she started down the stairs. In my memory, she was wearing a full length mink coat, high heels, a very stylish suit and carrying a round make-up case. Who could ever have been more sophsicated!

As my plane was making the descent into Lubbock, I looked at the fields white with cotton and mostly unchanged in the years that have passed since the 60's. I wondered what my aunt, on seeing this so many years ago was thinking. Was she, like me, thinking what a dismal, flat place Lubbock is? or was she glad to be coming home?

Just call me Trigger

The dreaded trigger finger has returned. This time in 2 fingers of my left hand. It makes typing very hard. Last time it was the thumb on my right hand and I was able to type with no problem. Right now, I'm using the pinky on my left hand to one finger type these letters.

And as if that was not enough ... the carpal tunnel syndrome in my left hand is flaring. The doctor said the two are related. Both are the result of overuse of the hand ... as in too much typing at a computer. Duh! that's all I do all day!

So it's back to braces and steriods and ice and resting the hand.

Enough with the pity party! Back to work!

On the Road - Tennessee Vacation Last Day

We overnighted in Chattanooga and chilled out in the room ... enjoyed the hotel pool and hot tub. Then it was up and about it again. We toured the Chickamauga battleground and were struck by the site. It has been kept much as it was during the battle in Sept of 1863. Open fields are surrounded by dense forest. Over 2000 men were never found and were presumed dead. Seeing the forest, it is easy to believe that a wounded man could die alone and never be found. The battleground is dotted with monuments to the divisions and regiments that fought on both sides (Union and Confederate). The park is also lined with informational boards that tell what happened at the place in the line; color coded blue for Union soldiers and red for the Rebels. The boards are situated in such a way so that if you are reading it, you would be looking in the same direction that a soldier would have been.

This picture is of the battle line of at Snodgrass Field which was the last battle at the site. You can see the monuments, cannon placements and the board with descriptions. The picture also show how dense the forest is at the edge of the field. The Snodgrass family had cleared this field and were farming it when the battle took place.


After touring the battleground, we went to Chattanooga and took the Incline railway up to the top of Lookout Mountain. The incline is a whopping 72.7 degrees! You start out sitting in the car in a reclining position and by the time you get to the top, you are sitting up straight. The first picture is one I took from inside the car. It is a really neat view and the top of the car is glass so you can see it all. The second picture is of the car leaving. In this one you can get a good feel for the incline. Lastly, here is a panorama of Chattanooga taken at the top of Lookout Mountain. Kinda hazy, but still I wanted to share it

On the Road - Tennessee Vacation Day 2

Leaving Gatlinburg and driving along the Cherohala Skyway a wonderfully curvy winding road. The highest point is Santeetlah at 5390 ft. We saw some color along the skyway but it was not as spectular as we had hoped. We may have been a little early and/or the drought is causing the leaves to turn from green to brown and drop with no color change.

I did manage to get some good shots of the mountains that make it live up to its name as the Smoky Mountains. I couldn’t decide which I liked best so here are the three best.

On the Road - Tennessee Vacation

We are in Tennessee on vacation and it is beautiful. On the first night, we drove through alittle town in Roan County and thought ... hm, we could live here!

The waterfall at the left is from our drive.

We spent the day getting to Gatlinburg and then driving the Cades Cove auto tour in the Smoky Mountain National Park. A lovely little valley surrounded by the mountains, Cades Cove was occupied until the early 1930's when the land was purchased by the Park service. Many of the original rough hewn homes and the old mill were preserved and is now a historic exhibit. The pastures and fields are farmed and/or being used to try to repopulate the area with natural grasses.

Here are some pictures from our drive. The first is from the Primative Baptist Church.

These pictures are of the Cable Mill. The first is a shot of the house, grounds with a barn in the background. This was taken from the porch of the General Store. The second picture is of the mill.

This is a picture of the Dan Lawson homestead.

And finally, this is a pictue of a very fearless deer. Dusk was falling as we neared the end of our drive. This deer and many others were coming right up to the roadway and cars. Unfortuneately, the deer have learned to beg for food instead of foraging.

Life Happens When You Least Expect It

On a recent Saturday, I got up early, scootered over for breakfast and then to the coffee shop for a cup and to read the newspaper. After I got home, I decided to give my scooter a bath. While drying it off, my husband brought me my cell phone so I could talk to a friend in need. Wham ...

After we hung up, I spent the next several hours making arrangements to travel to our friend's side and take care of some things for him. It is incredibly humbling and at the same time a tremendous responsibility to be called on in such a manner.

Our friend still is not out of the woods, but we'll continue to be there for him until he is better. We've got his back.

Humming Birds on the move

Humming birds are beginning their migration through Central Texas. I love this time of the year. I have a feeder right outside my office window and am treated to displays as the birds stop for a snack. In years past, the birds would just hover as they drink, but this year, I've seen several that actually grab hold of the feeder and hold on as they dip their bills in and out ... their wings never stop, but they are holding on. Interesting. Since my window faces the west, I have a very heavy screen on it so the birds can't see me as I watch them. Unfortunately, it also means that I can't get any good pictures of them. Oh, well ... ok, back to work now!

On the Road - Denver

So this past week, I was on the road in Denver. The folks I was working with in Denver are the best, nicest I've ever had the opportunity to spend a week with. The Supervisors even had a large fish tank in their office ... a group project. I couldn't resist contributing a little "no fishing" ornament.

Adding to my collection of airport photos. Here are some of Denver. When you first get off of the train from your terminal to baggage claim, there are these neat paper airplane shaped pointers that lead you from the train to the escalator up to the main terminal.

The main terminal looks like a tent. I tried to get a picture from the outside, but it was not good. This one is what it looks like inside. Very airy and open. A nice change from an airplane.

There is a really weird thing about the Denver airport in the train tunnel. The train has these cutesy sounds like a train whistle and clanging, which is ok. But there is some "art" and I use that term loosely inside the tunnels. Some of it was ok, but as you near the station, there are these arms with pick axes jutting out into the tunnel. Each is at a slightly different angle so the effect is that as the train whizzes past, it looks like they are moving to strike down. It was very creepy.

My schedule has been quite hectic the last few weeks. Between work and family trips, out of the last 21 days, I've spent a grand total of 4 nights in my own bed. Brutal. In that same time, I've been on 12 different planes and in 5 different towns. Add that all up and what do I get??? A big whooping summer cold is what! I started coming down with it mid week in Denver and by the time I left, I could hardly talk. I was severely medicated on the planes home. Looks like my big plans for the 3 day Labor Day weekend are hosed. I'm spending them in bed!

Serendipity

Serendipity is my favorite word because it describes something that happens to me when I least expect it.

Recently I've been wanting a piece of blue lace agate but have not had the time to get by Crystal Works in Austin to see if they had some. So, now I'm in my second week in Tampa and I'm reading the newspaper. I notice an ad for a place called Peace Tree Trading (a Native American Art store) and I thought, hm, Christmas is not that far away and I might find something for my brother. I pull into the parking lot and what do you know? Right next door is this really neat rock shop - Wally's Natural Wonders! And Yes! they had some really nice affordable pieces of blue lace agate!

Serendipity!!!

Brothers Camp

This weekend my husband and I had the opportunity to spend some quality time with his brothers and sisters-in-law. We truly had a wonderful time. One sister-in-law made two games for us to play: a trivia game of family history and a variation of the old newlywed game. Both were fun and caused a lot of conversation. The trivia game stirred memories and laughs and some "I didn't know that"s. The newlywed game was really a challenge. Hm, do I answer this the way I think he will answer or do I choose the answer that is the kindest? Very challenging and we are still talking about it!

One sister-in-law had brought an old family photo of our husbands' great-grandmother. We were all amazed at how much she looks like my husband's youngest son.

One sister-in-law was not able to be there for the entire time because she was moving her daughter into the dorm. Our niece is a freshman so this is a big event in her life and that of her mother. This marks the starting point of her adult life. I'm glad they had the opportunity to spend some one-on-one time together at this transitional point in their lives.

My husband and I came away from the weekend refreshed and very much at peace. I am very thankful to have these people in my life and hope that this becomes a yearly event. We all want to do it again so here's hoping!

There is something about 30 years

Wow! I just got an invitation to attend the 30 year reunion of my high school graduating class. Talk about a blast from the past! Unfortunately, I can't attend. But it did get me thinking about how in ways that seems like yesterday and in other ways it is so very long ago.

Its a strange sort of melancholy. I'm happy where I am now, but miss some of the people from that time. Knowing what I know now, I would have made different choices and a greater effort to keep in touch.

It's also interesting that this 30 year mark is hitting in more ways than one. I have pots and pans that I got as a wedding present 30 years ago (for the first marriage that didn't last 2 years). Recently, the handle on one of the pans started to crack and last night, it cut my finger. So I guess it's time to get new ones. But at the time, I thought "this shouldn't be breaking ... it's not that old" and then I thought about how old it was and was amazed that it was 30 years old.

Not long ago, I was at an antique shop and came across some dishes that I still use (again from that first marriage). They are in blue willow pattern and I use them every day. So I'm a little peeved to know that they are now considered antiques/collectibles and cost much more to replace than I paid for originally. So am I supposed to quit using them? I could, I guess. I guess I could purchase an expensive set to use every day ... but then in 30 years those would probably be considered antiques/collectibles. I can't win!

Summer Days

The fabled dog days of summer are upon us. The rain has moved on leaving the area with much needed full lakes. The down side is that is it humid. Walk outside mid day and one feels as if one has walked into a sauna. It makes you want to move very slowly and gives a reason to the tradition of siestas.

I sit in my cool office looking out the window on my front lawn. Blue sky broken by fluffly white clouds; sunlight dappling through the leaves; leaves and branches gently swaying in the breeze; the sight belies the heat ... it looks so inviting, but I know that once outside I would be reduced to a soggy, wet, limp, lump straining foot step by foot step to get back inside to the artificially cool and dry air in my house.

The cats know better than to even venture out. They curl on pillows and chairs or stretch on the rug in sleep. Cat napping!! now that's the way to spend the dog days of summer!

Resistance is futile

For years now, I've resisted becoming one of those people walking through airports seemingly talking to themselves (usually at a very loud volume) until you notice the thing in their ear. Yes, the blue tooth headset. Makes one look like a Borg wannabe. Not wanting that image, I've resisted, stubbornly hanging on to my wired ear piece that I've been holding together with duct tape (seriously).

Resisting that is ... until Monday. My cell phone has been becoming increasingly unreliable and had reached a point where it could be used for less than 30 minutes. Because I'm on the road so much, a working cell is a necessity.

On Monday it was off to the cell store to purchase the phone I'd researched and determined that I wanted. While there, my husband convinced me to go ahead and join the Borg. So now I have this very lightweight device hanging off of my ear. The model I chose had 33 different face plates so a little personalization was possible. Hm, I could even create my own insert ... I'll have to consider that.

My new phone is also lighter than my old phone. It has all of the same features, but is also GPS enabled and I got a navigation package to go with it. I justified the $10 a month for that because I travel to unfamiliar cities. I started to write "strange cities" but most aren't strange (except maybe Toledo) but they are unfamiliar so the GPS navigation package should help.

So, I guess resistance really was futile. I could put it off, but in the end, I was assimilated.

For those of you who have no idea what I'm refering to (Borg, assimilated, resistance is futile), I direct you to the wikipedia entry on Borg.

Changes are a coming

The company I work for just announced they are considering "strategic alternatives" including selling the company. WoW! I guess it's time to polish my resume. Time to think about the future. Of course, I know that I've just been flowing with the current ... content to not push too much ... life by accident as my old friend Bill Karlson would say. I guess it's time again to look at who I am and where I want to be in 10 years.

Trouble is ... I really like what I do, know the software really well, and enjoy the people I work with. Bummer.

Musings on a summer day

In 2001, when I was first working as a software consultant, I spent a lot of time in Phoenix. By a lot, I mean that for about 18 months, I spent more nights in Phoenix than I did in Austin. I had more alone time during that period than I have ever had in my entire life. So in the evenings or on airplanes, I often turned inward and reflected on who I was/am. I realized that I was not exactly who I wanted to be. To be truthful, I'm still not. But back then, I started thinking about how to become, more closely, who I wanted to be. I started on a campaign to define who I am as a person. I would say to myself "I am a person who _______." to reinforce the definition. I don't want to say change, because sometimes it would be reinforcement of a small little part of my personality or id. One that maybe needed nourishing in order to move myself closer to who/what, I want to be.

Some definitions from that time and where I am in making them happen (in no particular order):

• I am a person who rides a scooter - I purchased my vino and rode it. Customized with bumper stickers that express who I am and what I believe.
• I am a person who plays guitar - I purchased a cheap (<$80) guitar kit and signed up for classes at the local community college. I have on occasion carried a guitar with me on my business trips. It helps to keep me from working too much in the evenings. Although I'm practicing less and less as I am now a person who suffers with trigger thumb.
• I am a person who takes time for myself - I could be better at this, still. I try to see a massage/Reiki master on a regular basis. I try not to work on the weekend. I take more sick time than I used to. If I'm sick, I take off work rather than working through it. Interestingly enough, I recover quicker ... go figure.
• I am a person who is not as concerned with the dust in my home. This has been a big change for me. I'm not a neat freak or germ-a-phobe (although I have taken to wiping down my hotel room with disinfectant cleaner), but I used to get really uptight about the dust and fuzz, but now I'm much more relaxed about it. There are more important things in life.

Thought for the day

I ran across this in the May-June issue of UTNE. It spoke to me.

Late Fragment by Raymond Carver

And did you get what
you wanted from this life, even so?
I did.
And what did you want?
To call myself beloved, to feel myself
beloved on the earth.

On the Road - Tampa again

My project in Tampa is ramping up and I'll be spending a lot of time there. I promise to not post too much about Tampa ... but here are a couple of photos that I wanted to share. The first is a shot of the neat mosiacs on the floor of the airport.

The other is a sunset shot of a thunderhead that was building and eventually dropped a bucket load of rain on us.

On the Road - Midland

On the road again ... even though I just got back from vacation! This time, I am in the same time zone as my husband. What a treat! Midland is a really nice, clean town. I took this shot of a herd of bison at a local park.

Some airports keep the planes on the outside,

Midland brings 'em right in over the baggage claim area. Actually, Midland is home to the American Airpower Heritage Museum which houses and preserves authentic World War II artifacts and memorabilia, including uniforms of Allied and Axis countries, armament, photographs, weapons and equipment, and, you guessed it PLANES!

Memorial Day

Memorial Day has always held special meaning for me. As I was growing up, I helped members of the local Veterans of Foreign Wars post decorate soldiers’ graves with small American Flags. Mimi, my grandmother, was a member of the VFW and often wrote the programs that were presented on Memorial Day. Memorial Day also meant selling Buddy Poppies to raise money to support veterans in the Big Spring VA hospital with necessities and other items. I remember the Gold Star mothers who we also honored each Memorial Day for the sacrifice they bore for our country. Mothers who had sons in the military hung a banner with a blue star on it. Gold Star mothers were mothers whose sons were killed in action. Their blue star banner was replaced with a gold star banner. Recollections, also, of old soldiers drinking their memories of war away in a dark, smoky bar at the VFW. I learned to do the Texas Two Step in the arm of one of those old soldiers. Yes, arm is correct, not a typo … he had left one on the battlefield in Europe.

This Memorial Day, I was moved to tears by articles in the Austin American Statesman. The companion articles, “Army of one: War calls soldier back” and “Back in military life, kinship is renewed” were about a local veteran who has served a tour in Afghanistan, returned home, started back to school and got on with his life only to have the Army call him back. Sgt. Johnny Meyer wants to be a journalist and the Statesman is giving him the opportunity to provide articles from his current tour in Iraq. The description of Sgt. Meyer getting notified and the acceptance he expressed were heart wrenching. His description of connecting with others who had been called back over drinks at a local bar made me sick to my stomach. We, as a nation, are creating veterans that will most likely also be alcoholics.

Also on my mind this Memorial Day is my niece. She is a beautiful blond girl with potential that she doesn’t even recognize. She is smart. She is funny. She is a wonderful and caring person. She is in the Navy. She is on her way to Bahrain.

It breaks my heart to think of the changes that war will make to our young citizens such as Sgt. Johnny Meyer and my niece. I pray that they will be kept safe knowing that they will be changed when they return home. Please let them return home alive.

Vacation - Day Seven

From Twin Falls, Idaho, we drove the Thousands Falls scenic loop, which took us by the Hagerman fossil beds, ruts from the Oregon Trail and a thousand falls!
Here is a picture of the ruts. It is amazing that they are still viewable. It really makes me ponder the "foot print" that I (and we as a society) are leaving. What ruts are we making that future generations will be able to see long after we are gone? Did the people on the wagon trains making those ruts know, wonder or even care about the evidence their passing was leaving?













This is a nice scenery shot from an Oregon Trail rut viewpoint.

And finally, the last photo of our vacation … another shot of a waterfall. This is one of the "thousand falls" that pour into the Snake River.

Vacation - Day Six

Day six had us leaving Jackson and on our way to Twin Falls, Idaho. Over a high pass in the mountain and through farmland. Once we got to Twin Falls, we took a detour to see the Shoshone Falls. Shoshone Falls have a longer drop than Niagara Falls. It was beautiful as this picture shows.

Vacation - Day Five

In Jackson, WY. We had planned this to be a rest and relax, down day. My husband had planned to play bridge at the Senior Center. I had planned to go horse back riding and then get a massage. Unfortunately, my husband woke up with a cold. So he stayed in the hotel, reading and generally being quiet while I went about my day. Here’s a picture of me on my rented horse Dolla at Eagle Rock.

Vacation - Day Four

It started snowing while we were having breakfast and continued until we were out of Yellowstone. We stopped and took this picture as we were leaving. There was about 4 inches of snow.







As we were turning onto the Jenny Lake Scenic byway, we saw vehicles on both sides of the road. Slowing down, we asked what was happening and were told that there was a brown bear mother and her three cubs in the meadow. So naturally, I pulled over too (ever the tourist). This is the best shot I could get because the bears were a little far away for my camera. But I saw them with my own eyes and you will just have to trust me that the brown blobs in this picture are bears!

Jenny Lake












Just past Jenny Lake, we saw this gray wolf. The day was gray, the sage brush was gray and the wolf was gray. I cropped it and enhanced the color so the wolf stands out a little better.











Again working with the panorama on my camera. Here is a panorama of the Tetons.

Vacation - Day Three

We spent the night at the Lake Yellowstone Lodge. Built in 1891, it is the oldest standing lodge in the park and has been added on to a couple of times. Our large room that faced the lake was in the original portion of the lodge. The floor creaked and slopped. The bathroom was huge and had wonderful original tile. The glass in the windows in both the bedroom and the bath was original and had a few visual flaws and drips. I tried taking a picture, but it did not show up very well.

It turns out our visit to the park was just 3 days after it opened. Everyone was nice, but very new and therefore not everyone was very knowledgeable. We decided the best way to see the park was to let someone else do the driving.

Since we visited so early in the season, not all attractions, excursions and areas were fully open. We took the only tour available, the Circle of Fire tour. Our tour bus departed early in the morning and made a circle around the major geothermal features as well as by the falls. My husband sometimes opted to sit on the bus instead of walking around as his knees were hurting (turns out he was also coming down with a cold, but I digress and there will be more about that later). The weather was cool but not bad when we started out or when we ended. In between, there was snow. Cold, blowing snow. He sat the coldest, blowingest, snowyest one out, but I was a trooper and braved the weather to get some shots of the geysers. Here are the photo highlights of the tour.

Lake Yellowstone lodge – from the lobby looking out at the lake













Bluebell pool – One of the first of the thermal pools we saw. The color was bright blue.

Cooking pool – Actually in the lake. There are written accounts of settlers in the area fishing in the lake and cooking their catch in this pool. Our guide said that it probably was not a good idea as the pool has been tested and has large amounts of arsenic and mercury.













Here is a shot of our tour bus at the continental divide. Yep! that's snow!!

Cute little chipmunk watching for Old Faithful to blow. It was actually facing the geyser and looked like it was waiting.

What trip to Yellowstone would be complete without a visit to Old Faithful. I took several shots of the geyser, but this one is shows the gush at the highest point. Note the beautiful clear blue sky.

Here is a shot just an hour later of a geyser. I cannot remember the name, but the story is that this geyser was unpredictable until a few years ago when it blew really big. Since then, it has been a constant geyser, going off every few minutes. Not large like Old Faithful because it does not have time to build up as much pressure. If you look closely, you can see the snow falling in the picture. The little white dots of snow were really much bigger and the wind was blowing so it was very, very cold.

Down the road, we took a break and walked out in a meadow to see some wildlife. This shot is actually a three-fer, although you might be hard pressed to see the third animal. The bison mom and calf was my focal point. The geese and the ground squirrel (lower left hand corner) rounded out the triad. There was a large (30+) herd of bison and a large flock of geese. This photo only shows the mom and calf because I cropped it to get the "madonna" shot.

Water falls – I took way too many photos of water falls. Here are just a few.

Lower Falls

Upper falls

Little falls

Artist Falls Close up

Artist Falls panorama – I tried my hand at using the panorama feature on my camera.

Other wildlife shots

Here is a shot of a raven. Notice the ruts? Those are wagon ruts from the Oregon trail, still visible after over a hundred years. Between 1841 and 1869, the Oregon Trail was used by settlers migrating to the Pacific Northwest

Another ... much smaller, bison herd. These were right by the road and fearless. They were aware of us, but ignored us.














A lone male elk